Better luck, oh lets say... 2012?

"The Bible Guarantees It"... hmm...

So here we are, the human race, alive and kicking once more! Hmm, but why, wasn't the world supposed to be destroyed let's see, I don't know umm yesterday? Wow, Harold Camping, talk about a "You fucked up" moment. But see, not only did he fuck up once, he fucked up twice!

If you're not sure who Harold Camping is and what he did, well he predicted that Judgement day would be coming soon. A cyborg from the year 2018 would travel back in time and try to destroy the woman who gives birth to this futuristic baby Jesus who retaliates against this artificially intelligent system that we humans created.

Are you Harold Camping?

Wait... oh snap! I got the entire situation wrong, Glenn Beck predicted this, not Harold Camping. Come on, Harold Camping is innocent, we all make mistakes (and so did Hitler).

But most of all, where are the Zombies?!
I did not buy the Zombie Survival Guide,
(at a competitive price of $10 on Amazon.com, shit you not!)
Obtain a gun license and a gun (*sighs* Ahh, Texas),
to not emulate Rick Grimes in The Walking Dead!
CURSE YOU HAROLD CAMPING!!!!!
DAMN YOU TO HEEEELLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!

I, honestly, feel pity for whoever actually believed this crock-pot. If you truly did accept the declarations that Harold Camping has stated then you have given me no reason than to feel sorry for you. Why? Because it's a shame that you're living your life to and expect to die a certain way. Also, I sympathize his family and churchgoers for having to withstand what this man has declared countless and countless of times again and again. Now, the most embarrassing thing is that Harold Camping has corrected himself once more but where is the catastrophe? Where's the hailing meteors from outer space and God's raging hand hanging from the sky?!

Ok, well here's the real Harold Camping. Harold Camping is an old prune who states that the Christian Judgement day signs are around everywhere in the bible. He established a formula which that predicted that Rapture would commence in September '94. As of no result, he then went back and corrected his math, but that didn't help people at all! Apparently, from what I read yesterday in the radio, a millionaire in Mexico gave away all his money to repent his sins. Talk about a bitch slap in the face for you to be alive the next day, I know I'd reach my 12 gauge and aim straight to Camping and then my head. Harold Camping then announced the new day for Rapture would be May 21st, 2011, which of course as we all know, was yesterday. Unfortunately for him, where was God's hand in the sky? The eerie thing about this situation is that how people actually believed it.

A couple weeks ago if you don't watch Univision, like my mother religiously does, there's this talk show named Casos De Familia with Judith Grace. This man actually came in to the show and was promoting this idea that he had of building a subterranean society to prevent us dying. Where else have we seen this situation, oh yeah Blast From The Past with Christopher Walken and Brendan Fraser. If you ask me how any of that is relevant to this then my answer is this: do you not see how this ties in? People actually have seeked the man in order for him to build that underground society to prevent the end of the world. How psychotic can anyone be?

As you read this, it has been since nine in the morning that I have been writing this blog because I also happen to be writing a letter to Harold Camping. I have yet to find an address, so I think I will have to rely on 411 so I can send him my letter and here it is:

Dear Mr. Camping:

My name is Hugo Rivera. I just recently started a blog-spot. Just search my screen name Mee-Krob and hopefully you will find me (I doubt it). Before anything else is stated Mr. Camping, I would like to give you an applause because I admire you for what you have done: frightened millions of people, almost to the point of no return, as they have yet to witness the total annihilation of mankind that you have promised. Where are the catastrophes and calamities in the sky you affirmed Mr. Camping? Here we are, alive and well. At least I know I am, but some of your followers aren't, for the reason that they happen to be confused. Your words, to me, are comical and humorous but they have disturbed many members of our society, but I'm sure because you have lived over a hundred years longer than I have, your words have haunted many more.

Frankly, I truly feel obligated to write to you in concern of the allegations that you have conveyed towards your dear family, close friends, and fellow church goers. I fear that because of everything you have declared, they are and will be in an abysmal danger for standing by the words you have established and even building several vans that have not only been driven in the great state of California where you reside, but nationwide as well. I have yet to see one in Mexico or Canada. Don't you be discouraged though, your announcements, speeches and statements have made it there as well as countries such as Tanzania, Ethiopia, Jamaica, The Philippines, Israel and countless of other nations.

Last night, while I was driving, I heard a really intriguing story on the radio about this man in Mexico, millionaire nonetheless, gave away all of his money in order to repent for the sins he had committed. Wow, a million dollars? I'm sure the church would love that money as it seems that God can't keep a buck because they keep asking for more. Anyway let me get back to what I was writing. I don't know if you have heard of this story, like I hadn't before, I immediately laughed hysterically because he believed your walloping words. Where is he now Mr. Camping? I don't know, I shouldn't be the one you should ask. Every share (according to the radio, some shares were in Apple), dollar and dime were just randomly given away. I would've loved if it was given to a charity, but no, he just gave it away to anyone it concerned. Apparently from what the DJ in the radio stated, he hasn't been heard since.

To get back to the point, like I said in the beginning, here we are alive and well... well maybe not well, just confused. I know I'm not, because I don't believe in the bible and I especially know that if there is a God, it wouldn't destroy us, we'd do it ourselves. I know your educated; a civil engineer, church Elder, Sunday school teacher and an intellectual radio host to be exact, but what you have achieved and expressed is childish. I'm even surprised the FCC let you keep your radio stations because what you have accomplished to do is morally wrong. I know you could be anything but stupid and to clarify how childish this is, elementary wise childish. But to tell you the truth, some children are more mature than you are for spreading false assurances so let's just compare it with the movie Mean Girls starring Lindsay Lohan. Why do I make this relevant to that fart excuse of a movie? Because you're like a teenage girl who has nothing better to do other than spread false rumors.

Anyways, for some reason, your patience to see the world destroyed is admirable and to still be walking with us, at your age, waiting for it in this life is nothing more than surprising. You should be appreciative as your family members and friends are willing to stand by with you every step of the way to even help you climb stairs as you look out the window and try to see if the death-comets designated by God are hurling towards us. Just so you know, you and I have a lot in common: we both love to scare, pull pranks and make people laugh. But I envy you because you do it through channels that no one can avoid; the radio and internet. I, on the other hand, have to rely on my friends. I also envy you because it has been declared that you have made close to $80,000,000 with your little scam. My friend, you make those "get rich quick by working from home" schemes that are promoted on Television look like minimum wage opportunities with promotion and health-care benefits for illegal immigrants.
 
Everything you have said and written has had me laughing to the point my stomach may burst and I would die, due to the acid inside me slowly deteriorates my intestines. Although you could be a comedian, unfortunately that's not the case to the rest of the world because they have been raped by your farce "confirmed" validations of the end of the world. Now you even go far as to say "I didn't predict the world would end" after yesterday by correcting yourself as to just calling it judgement day. Well Mr. Camping, just so you know, the term End of the world is nothing but a longer description for the concept Judgement Day.  And what do we think when we hear the word Judgement Day? Destruction, chaos, or you could just easily acknowledge it by the Terminator movies with Arnold Schwarzenegger, who is also facing many problems, and the movie Independence Day where that gigantic UFO destroys the White House and the rest of those skyscrapers and buildings to smithereens.

Just ask President Obama about false promises.

It would help if you just admit you're wrong Harold, you're only hurting yourself and that damage gets worse as you age which in this case, according to the wrinkles that have accumulated above your other wrinkles, is too late to be stated. If you don't care and are actually proud of your allegations then I'm sorry Mr. Camping I have no good way to say this... but you are and have indeed fucked up. Not once, but twice! My friend, you are in serious problems because as we all know, people don't take false promises kindly.

For the lack of better words, you have royally boned a lot of lives in the ass because of the misjudgements and predicaments you have established upon many families and not only that, also as a result due to their vainly and foolish monetary investments to your many "godly purposes". Not just Americans, but people worldwide succumbed to your arrogant words and now will be left asking as to "what now" and I also ask, what now my mentally deranged friend? Now, I know and understand that their investments aren't your fault because it's not like you forced them to do so, but when a person is mad because something promised didn't happen, it has been known sometimes that they can kill for that reason. Your situation is comparable to what "musician" William Hung had done to the American dream: pissed on it, and then made a Christmas record to hail in on the cash.

Harold Camping, you will go down as the man who scammed an entire society into falling for your pompous beliefs that there will be a Christian Judgement Day. If there is such a day, then who cares?! Live it up for the moment! And I emphasize "for the moment" because I know you can't, on the account that Dr. Death is inevitably waiting for you around the corner giving you the finger, but stop making people feel uneasy about their untimely deaths just because you can't wait for yours! If you want to know how to remain alive even longer, just ask Larry King for advice as to how he avoids Death, he's currently averting him as well. I don't have any other way of expressing my frustration towards you, and I also know you don't have enough time on your hands so you can't remain reading this, but all in all-all I can say to you Mr. Camping, is for you to just shut the fuck up.

Sincerely yours,
Hugo Rivera.



Sorry if this post was really lengthy on account that I added my letter (which I will mail) but to end this, I just have a few last words to say. You shouldn't really make fun of Christians in general, you should just laugh at the skeptical Christians who are insanely promoting this man. I know a handful of Christians who are great and honest hard-working people but we shouldn't laugh at their beliefs just as we wouldn't like to be laughed at ours. It's not their fault that because one asshole said something, doesn't mean they all should be pointed at. In the case of Harold Camping, it's just truly shameful that him and his followers are sticking to their words that the Earth will be destroyed while they roll naked on an unsubstantial amount of dough because they managed to brain-wash abused and frightened people through their claims. On a last note, Camping has lost all contact since yesterday and has yet to be found because he's hiding from protesters... I can't imagine why?

Again, I am sorry for making this so long, 

but I really am truly thankful for you taking a bit of your time to read this!
Thank you!

P.S.: For my following posts, I want to share my views on the Fright Night re-make; talk about the current state of Nickelodeon television; share a few words and what I think about abbreviations and why they will kill all languages; a few video games that have tickled my fancy (and other things); The Amazing Spider-Man movie and I also want to hold some opinions on A.F.I.; and share some music from Fifteen, Propagandhi, Against Me and Mineral!

ALSO!!!

Rest In Peace
Mr. Randall Mario Poffo

A.K.A.

"Macho Man" Randy Savage

You have defined many WWF moments and I know we all are truly grateful for all the years of entertainment that you had sacrificed yourself. You will be missed and I will be waiting to see for the day that you are indicted to the WWE Hall of Fame. The only disappointment is that you are not alive to witness it.

The "Nolanized" Bane.

To pop my blog's cherry by posting an actual post, let me converse with you about the viral news that struck like lightning this morning to Christopher Nolan's Batman universe. Finally, an image of Tom Hardy as Bane in the upcoming The Dark Knight Rises has been released!

People were in shock!

Macauly did the same reaction when he saw Michael Jackson for the first time

People cried!

I know Dawson, I feel you man... I feel you! We understand each other!

And of course, guys worldwide jizzed all over their girlfriends with joy!

I know I would but unfortunately my girlfriend doesn't approve of such acts so I had to do it on a napkin

As a Batman fan, I know I could sleep at night safely knowing that Christopher Nolan has pleased and filled my spank-bank once more, but unfortunately it's going to be the last time he will be directing a Batman movie. On a fun note, although he won't direct another one, rumors say that he will be writing the next movie's script that will lead to a Justice League movie. Avenger's rip-off anyone? Such a Dreamworks vs. Pixar thing to do.

But to tell you the truth, I am slightly disappointed. Now, I know you'll be saying "But dude, you're still gonna watch the movie," of course I am! However, a single drag isn't a calamity folks! See, I'm a bit bitter as a result of the image that was released of Tom Hardy portraying Bane because of the mask. Everyone knows that Bane's mask is the staple of Bane other than "I WILL BRRRREAK YOU!" I mean, come on! Who doesn't love a guy who dresses up as heavy-duty, dominatrix gimp? I am very upset, and due to that, I had a pretty well pre-conception of how Bane's appearance would be which is as demonstrated:

The image on the right is the way Bane is animated in the comic books. Now, I am completely aware that movie directors and costume designers can't make a comic book character completely real without having to use CGI and in this case, Christopher Nolan is trying to make everything as real as it can possibly can... no CGI. Being that situation, I can understand how this brings complications, but that's not the case. You don't have to make the character look as that abortion that Joel Schumacher wiped his ass with in Batman & Robin as an excuse to call it Bane. You don't have to do that, but can you at least keep the mask? Recent images have demonstrated Tom Hardy to be very muscular and bulky so you can witness it yourself that he's clearly done his homework but now he's not the problem... the costume is the problem. I only hope that the costume keeps increasing to be fearsome, 'cause from what was released this morning I have to say... he just looks ridiculous, not menacing.

This next image is Tom Hardy on what happens to be, the Bane costume? If that's the Bane costume, I can't wait to see how Catwoman looks like... it better just be bra, that's all I can say. Now, we're too early in the production of the film to actually say this is the final incorporation of Bane's attire, but fanboys, come on! This is really stupid to make a big deal out of. If you thought that this post about Bane was supposed to be all about this image... well it sort of is, but it's for you to just shut the fuck up! Now not entirely to shut you up, I'm only going to analyze this image. 

To start it off, the mask sucks! First of all, he looks like a modern Hannibal Lecter in Silence of the Lambs and all he needs left is little tiny binoculars in his eyes and dreadlocks and he'll look like Kabal from Mortal Kombat. I really hope Christopher Nolan adds a few touches later into the film because this looks a bit dull. Maybe, just maybe, this is an image of him in the prison Peña Dura, thus the image actually just being an early form of Bane. If you look at it closely, he has marks down his spine. If they're Tom Hardy's actual scars then I may be wrong, but they could be marks from the tubes pumping the venom serum. If you keep looking even closer at his legs (I wish I had a way to zoom in on an image), he seems to be wearing a faded out black, close gray, and white pants. This brings my theory of him still being in prison to be true (I hope). Other than that, I just don't like the mask and I'm going to wait for more images to be released.

Ryan Reynolds, you should be ashamed of yourself! Learn from Tom Hardy!

 

Now like I said, they're trying to keep their distance far away from CGI as possible so I'm pretty sure that Tom Hardy will have to eat more fats and proteins and continue hitting the Bowflex to keep his body heavy but I know that they'll give him boots in the end to make him taller. Long-story short (you're probably telling yourself "after an hour of reading later, dick!"), I am still very excited for The Dark Knight Rises because Bane is one of my favorite villains. I do happen to own the Knightfall series so I hope that they try to at least use those series as an influence.


In conclusion, I know that Nolan will give all of his heart and cojones (I mean of course, that's what you get when you make a deal with the Devil to be a great director) to get this movie to be the best it can and with this cast of course he will! What, we got Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Anne Hathaway. There's even rumors that Dr. Hugo Strange will be involved in this as well so our loads over our girlfriends will be even stickier. I'd say, leave your comments on what you think but unfortunately, nobody has yet to subscribe or follow or whatever the fuck you wanna call it but I'll let you know... there will be severe consequences to hate-comments.

I..... WIIIILLLLL

Thanks for reading!

P.S.:

If we survive the destruction of the world tomorrow May 21st, 2011, then stay tuned for my next posts! I want to share my views on the Fright Night re-make; talk about the current state of Nickelodeon television; a few video games that have tickled my fancy (and other things); The Amazing Spider-Man movie and I also want to hold some opinions on A.F.I.; and share some music from Fifteen, Propagandhi, Against Me and Mineral!

Welcome! I should get a fanfare!

Well after deciding and deciding, I finally arrived at the conclusion to make my own blog. I always relied on MySpace and Facebook to do a single blog but unfortunately for MySpace, it's a total lag-wagon (I can't even sign in because of how slow the shit is, what's the deal with that MySpace?) and Facebook... well I'm just going to drop it there. First of all, let me introduce myself; my name is Hugo Rivera. I enjoy music, reading and good television shows.

I, honestly, feel like writing about anything. From music I've heard, to the books I've read, movies I've seen and favorite TV shows as well as anything that happens in life that I find amusing, which in reality, everything in life I happen to find amusing. Pretty much anything I can comment, I'll write about. Politics also aren't safe especially the occasional comical politics ranging from:

Federal,

State,

Guns rule... just ask Governor Perry you just wouldn't understand fucking liberal hippies!

Local,

Courtesy to Mayor Raul Salinas for letting me use his image.

and of course, Foreign

Don't fuck with 'Merica Emperor Palpatine!

Well, I hope you enjoy the two cents that I can give to everything I can think of. I really don't have much to say anymore and besides this took like two hours to write on the fact that I had to go to my sisters school... school, who likes school anyway other than these kids.